Waters

Disappointment washes wave after wave after wave. Why doesn't it ever end?
I saw something along the lines of "after you're hurt again and again and again, the nerve endings are destroyed. That's why you feel numb. Don't be proud of it."
I'm not, cause I'm not numb to it.
But slowly, slowly I'm learning to brace myself against these waves; I don't prepare for it, I don't anticipate it, but when it comes I learn how to handle it. I run back from the shore, but it catches a small part of me.
Which is better? Running away from the waves that might one day drown you, or learning to swim and conquer them?
I can't swim, never have been able to.
Recently I've had a mildly harrowing experience in Penang when I was in the sea, I went a little too far out and the waves pulled me back till my feet weren't touching the sand. I went under, I held my breath and tried to move forward, kick against the water, come up, anything. Waves retreated, my head bobbed out, Gwen was at the water's edge worried about my safety. Wave crashed after and I disappeared again. I pulled forward till I hit the ground. I smiled at Gwen like I had everything under control.
I think conquering them sounds like a good idea.